Date Your Wife Podcast Episode #101: The Power of Space

* This is an encore presetation from August 28, 2018.*

The White’s discuss the importance of getting away as a couple in this week’s episode.

Every week inside the Date Your Wife Podcast, married couple Danielle K. White and Garrett J. White share insights and perspectives from within their own lives regarding Sex, Money, Parenting & Communication.

In this week’s episode of the Date Your Wife Podcast, our Focus is PARENTING!

Point #1: Reconnection Brings Rejuvenation

  • Danielle:I think it’s crucial to have time together to reconnect, so that when you go back home to the kids, you are rejuvenated.
  • When your relationship is on point, kids notice. They can pick up on the energy between you and your significant other.

Ask Yourself: How do you show each other that remembering your anniversary is important to you?

Point #2: Mommy Guilt

  • Danielle: Mommy guilt  happens to all the moms I talk to. Even though you’re excited to get away with your husband, and end up having a great time, there’s always this weird anxiety leading up to the vacation.
  • I feel that anxiety never really goes away unless you just push forward. You have to go on these trips and realize your kids are going to be just fine.

Ask Yourself: How do you as a couple deal with two different visions of where to invest your money?

Point #3: Hiring Help

  • Garrett: Can you see how your entire world has been held hostage by the fact that the only people you will trust to watch your children are your parents?
  • The entire game from a guy’s perspective comes down to you as a man creating space for your wife. One of the big hurdles you’re going to have to overcome is getting your wife to be okay with hiring help that is not free and not part of the family.

Ask Yourself: How do you and your wife feel about this?

Point #4: Cashing In Chips

  • Danielle: Free help is never free. I feel like there is this debt with the Universe when it comes to family. “I watched your kids so you have to watch mine; I brought you dinner so you have to bring me dinner, too” There’s always this unspoken feeling of cashing in of favors with family and close friends,
  • There’s no such thing as free help when you go into it with the mindset of” I will do this for you if you do this for me.” It becomes this game of “I owe you.”

Ask Yourself: How often do you use your parents  and friends instead of hiring someone?

Point #5: What’s Important to You?

  • Garrett: Some guys will say, “I don’t have enough money to get a babysitter.” I say bullshit. You have enough money to put gas in your car; you’ll have enough money to get what you believe is important to you.
  • Space away from the kids creates perspective and power; perspective on your children, perspective on you as a couple, and perspective on your life.

Ask Yourself: What are your priorities?

Communication Challenge:

Have a conversation around the topic of Free Help vs Hired Help.

Date Night Topic:

Talk about places you would like to go on your quarterly trips together, set the dates, and begin making plans for them.

Quote of the Week:

“When you move away from working in the family and in the relationship, and start to work on the relationship and on the family by taking trips and date nights away, you gain perspective. And that perspective is your power.”

-Garrett J. White

“All you ladies out there, stop trying to be superwoman. It’s not serving you. Surrender to the fact that date nights are important and vacations are important, regardless of the anxiety you have surrounding your children. Guess what? You’re not the only one that can parent your children.”

-Danielle K. White