Date Your Wife Podcast Episode 86: Easier To Be King In Business Than At Home

The topic of money is this week’s conversation inside of the Date Your Wife podcast. The unique dynamics inside of a marriage relationship create a very difficult game for many couples when it comes to the sticky topic of money.

Every week inside the Date Your Wife Podcast, married couple Danielle K. White and Garrett J. White share insights and perspectives from within their own lives regarding Sex, Money, Parenting & Communication.

In this week’s episode of the Date Your Wife Podcast, our Focus is MONEY!

Point #1: Catch-22

  • Back in the day, Danielle hated Garrett because he was working so much. But she didn’t hate the business because that’s what was paying the bills. “I got to this place where I felt Garrett loved the business more than he loved me.”
  • Garrett: Men can control what happens in business more than they can control what happens at home. It’s easier to be the King in business than it is to be the King at home.

Ask Yourself: Gentlemen, have you lost your crown? What are you going to do to get it back?

Point #2: Split in Two

  • Many women who out-produce their husbands are in this space of how do I deal with my husband who is not being the man? I’m dominating him in business and trying to decide if I should get a divorce.
  • Garrett: When a man allows his wife to split the bills, it splits his power and creates a bit of submission in a weird way. Men, at the primal level, must be okay with the stewardship and responsibility of, “I must pay the bills independent of my wife.”

Ask Yourself: How do you as a couple feel about this?

Point #3: Wake-Up Call

  • At one point in their marriage, Danielle hid how much money she was making, and split up her bank accounts to create a safety net for herself because she wasn’t sure if their marriage was going to work out.
  • When she got triggered about something, she revealed to Garrett that she had made $30k the previous month which served as a wake-up call in the form of a big two by four straight into his balls.

Ask Yourself: Ladies, why do you hide your money from your husband?

Point #4: Show Me the Money, Honey

  • There’s an artist inside Danielle’s Big Money Stylist network who is outproducing her husband in a massive way. “I love my husband and I want to be more sexual, but I’m just not attracted to him.”
  • Garrett: This is a sticky situation, and there’s not a simple one-cut solution. When Danielle was making more money, her tolerance of behavior by me went down, and her desire to connect with me sexually also went down.

Ask Yourself: How is this dynamic affecting your marriage?

Point #5: Friday Night Fights

  • A recent fight between Danielle and Garrett would have been the end of their marriage a few years ago. But this time it compelled them and opened them up.
  • Danielle: When your foundation is rocky, and an explosion happens, it’s hard to build that back up. Now, we can have a fight and come back and talk about it because our foundation is more solid.

Ask Yourself: What condition is the foundation of your marriage in?

Communication Challenge:

Gentlemen, I want you to have a conversation with your wife about the dynamics of money. What is the connection to the attraction for you and the money you’re making or the lack of money you’re making?

If you’re a man and not paying the bills, have that conversation with your wife and just see where it takes you. If you can get her to be honest with you, it may be the prompting that you need to ultimately rise.

Date Night Topic:

Have a conversation about what you can do to create a stronger foundation inside of your relationship. What does that look like for both of you?

Quote of the Week:

“Commitment itself is the bridge or gateway to actual direct communication. If you’re not committed to your marriage, or to the person you’re married to, direct communication cannot happen.”

-Garrett J. White

“There are very few men on this planet who are actually ok with their wives out-fucking producing them. The girl owns the money card AND the vagina card. She owns the victory, the gina, and the money.”

-Danielle K. White      

“When you weren’t my money, you weren’t my honey. When I hold all the control, there’s no chemistry.”