Grab some popcorn, folks, and get ready for another off the charts episode of the always spicy and highly entertaining Date Your Wife podcast, featuring the refreshing “tell it like it is” co-hosts, Garrett J and Danielle K White. They’re at it once again as they delve into Garrett’s self-proclaimed favorite topic of Sex. Danielle calls Garrett out on his creepy strip shows in his weird thong and invites him to become more comfortable with his sexuality, and Garrett says he doesn’t want empty sex – aka vaginal masturbation. Fan favorites Quickie Quickie Porn Star and TTF are back in the mix, and there’s a new arrival on the scene: Slip ‘n Slide. *EPISODE REPLAY FROM MARCH OF 2018.
Every week inside the Date Your Wife Podcast, married couple Danielle K. White and Garrett J. White share insights and perspectives from within their own lives regarding Sex, Money, Parenting & Communication.
In this week’s episode of the Date Your Wife Podcast, our Focus is SEX!
Point #1: Sexy Seduction 101
- Being sexy is as simple as walking around in a new bra and underwear while casually asking, “Have you seen my toothbrush?” Garrett suggests saving money by skipping the bra and just buying the panties. Sometimes it’s a ‘top-stays-on-bottom-comes-off’ kind of night. Other times, it’s an everything comes off, keep the lights on and do a little dancing around kind of night.
- Most women need a little wining and dining before the main course. Take her there just a little bit and then worry about yourself.
Ask Yourself: How have QQPS (Quickie Quickie Porn Star) and TTF (Touch Me-Tell Me-Fuck Me) become game changers in your marital sex life?
Point #2: Sex Therapy Is Not About Sex
- Throughout their marriage, Danielle had never felt there was a safe space to talk about sex with Garrett, making it awkward for her to even bring up. She found herself starting to believe his story about her that she didn’t want to have sex.
- Sex therapy for the White’s yields the single greatest breakthrough for Garrett after Danielle divulges a piece of information that instantly shreds a story he created during his first marriage and brought with him into theirs. Garrett creates a new story which shifts and rocks their world.
Ask Yourself: Men: What is your sexual story?
Point #3: The Perfect Storm
- As a 15-year-old Mormon teen who has been raised that sex before marriage is taboo, Garrett divulged to his parents his plan to have sex with his 18-year-old girlfriend after the upcoming Prom. He immediately gets shipped away to live with his grandparents in Utah for a couple of months, and as a result, never has a conversation about it or closure with his girlfriend whom he has been dating for a year and is madly in love with.
- Garrett dates his first wife under the umbrella that says sexual relations are taboo before marriage. Yet, they fool around and have sexual relations, lie about it to their religious leaders, adding to the guilt and shame created when he was 15. Sex in his marriage with Danielle becomes problematic, as Garrett carries into it this brewing cesspool of guilt, shame, and pain, while Danielle, because of her Mormon upbringing, feels like she has to stifle the sexual feelings that come naturally to her.
Ask Yourself: How has your upbringing shaped and influenced your attitude, beliefs, and stories about sex?
Point #4: Written in the Stars
- In her astrological studies, Danielle is validated by her discoveries that, as a Taurus woman, she is very sensual, loves cuddling, and is very happily satisfied with her traditional approach to sex because a good thing never gets old. She’s been changing it up with QQPS, which Garrett loves.
- Communication for Gemini’s is huge and they love to be emotionally stimulated more than anything else. Garrett realized that he had gotten so disrespectful as a husband and exposes the lie that all he wanted was someone to have sex with every day. What has exploded their sex life is their connection to truth.
Ask Yourself: What is written in the stars about you individually that resonates with you and that can serve you and your spouse in your marriage?
Point #5: Your Story is Your Biggest Problem
- Garrett: I didn’t know what our relationship would be if we weren’t always arguing about having sex. Danielle: I was fearful and wondering if we have a new story, does that mean we have a new story with somebody else?
- There was a lot of action and collision that had to happen, which were really a pursuit of truth underneath the surface of all the lies that we were telling, which came in two forms: the blatant lies we were telling AND the stories that we started to believe. Your stories are powerful enough to convert your husband or wife to believe.
Ask Yourself: What are the lies that the collision in your marriage is trying to uncover?
What is your sexual story? Do the investigation on your own about your own story, and then in a conversation with your spouse, share your results with them.
Date Night Topic:
On your date night, be open to having a conversation about how the stories you tell are your biggest problems.
Quote of the Week:
“We had come to the point where our stories had become so intense that it was almost easier for us to burn the story and burn the relationship…and just try again with somebody else. But the crazy part was, guess what we would have taken with us? The same fuckin story.”
-Garrett J. White
“I bet a lot of men feel like that towards their wives [I need a vagina. We’re married. Your vagina is mine.] It devalues the actual qualities that they want and need to create fulfillment, and it devalues those qualities in themselves. They start looking at and treating their wives as objects. I felt that way and was thinking ‘you better give me more credit than just being a good piece of ass.'”
-Danielle K. White