Welcome to a new episode of the BMS Podcast with Ani, lead trainer of BMS and Krystal, DKW Salon Manager, as they explore the topic of failure and share stories from Artist’s lives as well as their own, demonstrating courage amid the unknown while weighing options between potentially life-changing possibilities.
Point #1: Failure
- When the word failure is mentioned, how does that make you feel? What meaning do you attach to it? One might see failure as not doing anything or not trying. Others might attach a negative meaning to failing when in reality, it can also be seen as growing.
- Krystal believes you have to fail to get good at something because you’re never good right off the bat. Both ladies agree that people attach fear to failure
Ask Yourself: What meaning do you attach to failure?
Point #2: It’s a Process
- Ani: There’s nothing that after three times, you’re going to be good at. You’re going to be a complete failure. You’re going to fail a thousand times over, and not only that, failure’s going to be different for everybody.
- At every stage of life, failure is going to look completely different, dependent upon the benchmarks you have in place, what values you have, and what your belief system is.
Ask Yourself: How has a fear of failure affected your life?
Point #3: Sink or Swim
- Krystal feels that ego plays a part in why people attach fear to failure. “You have this pride and ego inside you, which can help you AND also hurt you. You have to find a balance. It’s easy to have thoughts like, “Oh shit, I don’t want to be a loser. I don’t want to fuck this up.”
- Ani: I feel when you’re put inside of that pressure cooker, you either rise or you fucking die; it’s either do or die, sink or swim. I also feel like the more successful you are, the harder it is to take any kind of risk because now that fear is ten times greater.
Ask Yourself: As you look back, how have you handled “sink or swim” situations?
Point #4: Complacent No More
- Before her arrival at DKW Salon, Krystal had been with her previous salon for fourteen years. During the last three years there, she had found herself complacent, which is why she joined Mastermind. Although she had personally worn extensions for years, she had never offered them to her clients. “I’m never going to put this on someone else because I can barely make my own look good…and I’m a stylist!”
- It was through searching for something better for herself that Krystal found NBR, got certified, and joined Mastermind. “I was thirsty for more. And even though it was super scary to make that jump, I just knew that I couldn’t stay complacent anymore. I had nothing else to lose.”
Ask Yourself: What were the circumstances that caused you to move forward when you were feeling complacent?
Point #5: Which One Would You Regret More?
- In response to a recently received email from an Artist who found herself in a less than desirable situation, yet felt paralyzed when it came to taking action, Ani shared the following with her:
- “I’m not here to tell you what to do, but I’m going to ask you this question: Which one would you regret more? Would you regret staying inside of the “shit hole” salon OR would you regret leaving and trying, whether you “made it” and succeeded or failed? Which one would you regret more?”
Ask Yourself: Where in your world do you currently find yourself in a situation where asking yourself this question would be beneficial?
Quote of the Week:
“I don’t look at it as what am I most scared of, or what am I most afraid of. It’s which one would I regret more, staying or leaving? This question has always kept me going forward.”
— Anianne Rivera
“If you never do anything, you’re never going to grow; you’re never going to move past that fear. Sometimes you just have to say fuck it and move forward.”
— Krystal Coit